The Elephant. [life is beautiful]

In my experience, one of the toughest battles to fight is the battle of the mind. I've relied a lot on logic and reason in my life because I believe them to be largely trustworthy. (Hence, the love of math and thus my degree choice. =P)
To look at the world through the eyes of reason provides a consistent framework with which to view everything.

But, I'm learning that sometimes logic fails us when we only see part of the picture.

Often times I feel like this is our world:

I feel like one of those blind men in the picture. In fact, I think a lot of us are like those men.

The reason there is so much disunity is because we all are given a different part of the puzzle to solve. 

None of us know the full story. 

If we are standing next to the foot of the elephant thinking it's a tree, we will naturally surround ourselves with people who are experiencing the same thing. Even if they are next to a different leg, their perspective will be basically the same.

But what happens when someone next to the leg meets someone sitting on top of the elephant? 

What happens when one person is adamant that it's a tree, while the other is sure that it's a fan? 

What then?  

We tell ourselves it's best to be with people who think like us. But what if the only way to draw together is to realize that we don't have the full picture?

Now, please do not think that I am adopting a relativistic world view as so many hold these days.

There most certainly is absolute truth. 

The truth is that it's an elephant. 

But only when our blind eyes are open can we recognize that. 

Again, we each only have our small piece of the big puzzle.

It is of utmost importance to open our ears to those around us and realize that they each have something to teach us. 

We have to learn from each other. 

There's a reason James reminds us we should be "quick to listen, slow to speak".  (James 1:19)

Everyone needs a voice. 

Everyone needs to be heard.

As far as being able to actually see the whole elephant, there is One who can open blind eyes. 

Right now is one of those moments when I feel like I have been given a glimpse of the whole picture.

This perspective--the perspective of truth brings freedom.

Jesus promised us, "If you hold to my teaching [and gain My perspective], you are really my disciples. Then you will know the Truth, and the Truth will set you free." (John 8:31-32)

When we step back and recognize the beauty of the whole, we are able to rest in knowing that it's all gonna be okay. The world is in the palm of Someone's hand much greater than all of us. 

It's moments like these I realize why Jesus said [indignantly], "Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life?" (Luke 12:25)

We worriers are so silly sometimes. (I'm as guilty of this as anyone.)

But I mean for reals! Let's think less about what is going wrong and what could go wrong and take a minute to relax, "smell the roses," and remember: 

Life is Beautiful.

2012. [my year in review & a giant 'thank-you']

Well it's that time of year again: a time to reflect.
2012 was one heck of a ride.
Man it's crazy to think about how much happened in the last year!
The events of 2012 broke me in so many ways: physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
I was touched by cancer, heartbreak, confusion, anger, bitterness, depression, and the list goes on...
But those things are not what I see when I look back over the year.
Instead I see how I was touched by God: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.
I experienced healing, was given clarity and peace, was taught more fully how to trust, how to forgive and how to rejoice daily, and was given so many other amazing gifts it would take me quite some time to speak of them all.
I was deeply impacted by an active God who sent me the best of friends at just the right times.
He sustained me and renewed me.
He kept His promises to be with me through fire.
He gave me peace beyond understanding.
He whispered to me words of comfort in my pain and danced with me in my joy.
He answered prayers and fulfilled dreams.
He has turned my weeping into dancing time and time again.
His pursuit is unending.

This year may not have been what I was expecting. It was certainly not what I would have chosen if you had asked me a year ago to describe my ideal 2012. But, when do things ever turn out exactly how we want or plan? After all, God did say:

"As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are My ways higher than your ways
and My thoughts than your thoughts." ~Isaiah 55:9

So I thank God for His ways in 2012 and look forward to His ways working through 2013 and beyond!
I would also like to thank each of you who made my year what it was.
I was just reading over some of the many notes I received during the summer and they made me cry once again.
The love I've received this year both in response to news of cancer and in general has been immeasurable.
I want you to know that I love you all and am filled with gratitude from the bottom of my heart for the blessings that I came to know in 2012.

<3 HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE! <3

Hope. [when tragedy strikes]

It's amazing to see the compassion in everyone's hearts after the events of yesterday, but is there more we can do aside from posting a status about our shock and sentiments?
Sometimes it's difficult to know how to respond to such abhorrent tragedies, but Rene Schlaepfer said something really profound last night that has stuck in my head.

In answer to the question of how to react to the events of yesterday he said

"Don't respond to hate with hate; respond with Love. 

Don't respond to despair with despair; respond with Hope."

I think it's often tempting to give into fear and despair because we think that this is how we are supposed to respond. We think that if we aren't feeling the hopelessness the people there are feeling then we aren't compassionate enough. 
But how wrong is that? 
We should ache in empathy for those who are hurting,  but true compassion is accompanied with action. True compassion lasts. I urge us all to realize that the immediate support response has been overwhelming, but the real need will come in the days, months, and years ahead. There will be a time when everyone else forgets, but the parents are still living without their children. The children will still live with the horrific memories. The community will still live in shock and bewilderment at the evil that entered their town.

As CNN states, it seems, "The overwhelming sentiment: Hug your kids closely."
Really? That's it? All we can do is appreciate those we love because we never know when they will be snatched from us?
Is there not more hope than that? Did not Jesus come for the very purpose of healing and freedom? 
Healing from broken hearts. Healing memories. Setting people free from the past. Setting people free from horrors that bind them to regret, fear, and despair. 

As Christians we have something to offer those in Connecticut.
"The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective." (James 5:16b) 

Let's not forget that we can intercede on behalf of the victims of this evil.
Let's not forget that there is Hope!
Let's not forget that Jesus redeems the unredeemable.
Let's not forget that Jesus heals the unhealable.
Let's not forget that we have a part to play in that healing.
Our prayers and thoughts of empathy need to not end when we are able to brush past our thoughts of this horror.
It is our responsibility as those who know the Hope to help provide the Hope.

So in this tragedy and all others like it, I challenge all of you who serve our King:
Don't forget; don't despair. 
Instead remember; instead bring Hope. 
Take action: PRAY! 
Pray that the hope and restoration that you have found will become real to the people of Connecticut. 
Pray that the love and healing that you know to be real will be poured over the people of Connecticut. 
Pray and don't stop. 
My prayer is that I will not forget. 
My prayer is that God will continue to bring these people to our hearts and minds in the days to come when the horror and pain sink in for those directly touched by the evil while everyone else moves on.






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Time. [scattered thoughts in the midst of finals]

As a 5th year college senior, sometimes I wonder about the purpose of time.
They say, "Time is money."
But what if that changed?
What if in this world time did not matter?
Think of the people we would be--no longer sleep deprived because an alarm to awaken us unnaturally would not be needed.
Think of the backs that would lose all the tension and the brains that ache no longer mentioned because the stress would be alleviated.
No more deadlines. No more time crunch.
No more pressure to quicken the pace.
Late would be a foreign concept.
Early wouldn't exist either.
What if time wasn't money?
What if?
Let's bring time back to being just a way to mark our place but nothing more.
What if our world operated in a way that valued time spent as it was happening instead of only valuing the time that is to come or the time that has passed?
Time is a gift.
We can enjoy anticipation or we can run right by it.
We can stop and smell the metaphorical roses or we can live our lives like bare-feet on hot coals, racing through just trying not to fall.
We hurt ourselves.
They say we forfeit years of life for minutes of worry.
We end up losing the very time we try so hard to gain.
And to what end?
Did we enjoy our time?
What if time were just a word and not money?
What if...

Thanksgiving. [where does joy come from?]

"Enter His gates with thanksgiving and His courts with praise;
give thanks to Him and praise His name.
For the Lord is good and His love endures forever;
His faithfulness continues through all generations." ~Psalm 100:4-5

Thanksgiving and praise.
That's how we're supposed to enter the presence of our Lord.

"You have made known to me the path of life;
You will fill me with joy in Your presence,
with eternal pleasures at your right hand." Psalm 16:11

In His presence comes fullness of joy which gives us Life.

"...the joy of the Lord is your strength." ~Nehemiah 8:10b

But sometimes it doesn't seem that easy.
Life gets hard.
Sometimes our hearts are heavy.
Sometimes our hearts are broken for an injustice we recognize either against us or someone else.
Sometimes we get angry and frustrated about these terrible things that really should not continue.
Sometimes it's easier to list everything going wrong.
Sometimes it's easier to be mad.
Sometimes when all these emotions are building up, we just need to cry.
Sometimes sorrow is present and we can't deny it.
That's okay.

We must give that sorrow and pain to Jesus, laying it at His feet.

"Weeping may stay for the night, but rejoicing comes in the morning." ~Psalm 30:5 

"Those who sow in tears will reap with songs of joy." ~Psalm 126:5

This is a promise.
Joy is our reward.
Thanksgiving is our anthem.

We always will have a reason to sing.

Suffering. [seeing the reason for pain]

What is the purpose of physical pain?
It's a warning signal, right? It means something is wrong with our body. Sometimes it's because we have eaten something bad. Sometimes it's because we did something not very smart that resulted in injury. Other times it's not our fault. We can pick up viruses from other people. We can be physically attacked by others. Some pain is caused intentionally; some is by accident.

I feel like it's a similar thing with pain on a larger scale: suffering in general. Except this time the cause is sin. This sin can be our own. Or it can be from someone else--intentional or not. "The wages of sin is death..." (Romans 6:23) What does "death" mean exactly? Could it be an absence of Life? This doesn't only mean physical death. It can mean any sort of absence of life: depression, illness, emotional, physical, or spiritual torment, etc.
Shouldn't we then recognize that if we see the latter present, there's a reason for it? Again, sometimes it is because of our own sin; many times it's because of someone else's sin. But it's a warning signal. Like physical pain, it shows that something's wrong.

I've been thinking a lot about why so much crap happens. People often seem to blame God for the suffering in our world saying, "If God is really good..why does life suck?"
I've certainly had my moments of asking the same question myself. But then I stop and think about the reason the pain is there.
It's a symptom.
Our world has denied its only true Life support system--our Creator--so no wonder its dying.

We cannot expect to have a perfect world from the perfect God unless that world is in complete submission to that perfect God. The beauty of the gospel is that He pierces through our dark rebellion to give us a glimpse of His light even though we as a world continue to deny Him.
His love is so strong that it cannot be stopped by an entire world that has chosen evil.
He still heals.
He still comforts.
He still restores.
He still redeems.
He still  makes beauty from ashes.
He still works everything for those who obey Him.

I am continually blown away by the way He turns everything into something good.
There is nothing that He does not use. Everything is an opportunity for Him to reveal His love more and more.

In the same way the bad is a symptom of sin, the good is a symptom of God's love--His overabundant bubbling brook of Goodness.
If we are going to blame Him for the evil that is a result of our sin, should we not even  more give Him credit for the blessings?

"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of heavenly lights who does not change like shifting shadows." (James 1:17)

Why don't we spend  more time marveling in the gifts we have been given rather than wishing we were given the same gifts as other people?

What kind of a slap in the face to God is it to spend our lives complaining about the struggles instead of giving thanks for the growth that comes from them?

Trusting.

Sometimes I feel like certain songs were written specifically for me.
This is one of them.

"Sometimes all we have to hold on to

Is what we know is true of who You are
So when the heartache hits like a hurricane
That could never change who You are
And we trust in who You are

Even if the healing doesn’t come
And life falls apart
And dreams are still undone
You are God You are good
Forever faithful One
Even if the healing
Even if the healing doesn’t come

Lord we know Your ways are not our ways
So we set our faith in who You are
Even though You reign high above us
You tenderly love us
We know Your heart
And we rest in who You are

You’re still the Great and Mighty One
We trust You always
You’re working all things for our good
We’ll sing your praise

You are God and we will bless You
As the Good and Faithful One
You are God and we will bless You
Even if the healing doesn’t come
Even if the healing doesn’t come"

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