Monday, February 17, 2014
Sunday, February 9, 2014
Health. [God's priorities]
Getting sick in Haiti and everything that happened to my team along with the fact that as far as I know I still have cancer in my body led me to really ponder the meaning of health.
Which is a greater priority to God--the state of our physical bodies or the state of our hearts and minds?
In our culture it seems like we value physical comfort far above most other things.
However, my experience has reminded me that the physical state of my body is not what is most important.
When I first was diagnosed with cancer, I and many other people pleaded with God to heal me.
Sitting here a year and a half later still with cancer would make many people think that God has yet to answer our prayers.
He must not be paying attention or want to heal me, right?
I am convinced that this is definitely not the case. Although He has yet to heal my physical body, I know that He has been working on something much bigger and better than I could possibly ask for in my limited perspective.
His way of healing me has been to heal my heart and free me from the anxiety and depression I have walked with for far too long.
He is making me new.
He is setting me free.
He is healing me.
It was in the midst of completing a task out of obedience (DTS) that I learned this.
I was lying on a cot in the middle of the Haitian countryside, sick with a fever that had reached over 102 degrees. The room I had lived in for two weeks was also the home of cockroaches, countless mosquitoes, a family of mice that ate through my stuff, a scorpion that I found on my bed one day, and a family of birds that enjoyed squawking in the wee hours of the morning and making a mess on our beds with their nest building and incontinence. Needless to say, the conditions of my body and my surroundings were less than ideal.
However, I wouldn't trade that experience for the world. As I lay on my cot soaked in a mixture of sweat and the melted ice that was used to cool me down, I found myself filled with joy like scarcely before. Laughter began to flow and I could not contain myself.
I felt so free and so content.
I was in a place that I had come to love with people I had come to adore, and I had the Spirit of Christ within me.
Nothing else mattered.
It's a funny thing to think of what it took for me to experience that kind of peace but it's just proof that physical conditions and health are not what are most important.
From where I stand right now, I would do anything out of obedience to God and suffer any amount of physical discomfort and pain in order to feel that kind of freedom deep in my soul.
After all, that's what He promised us, isn't it?
Physical discomfort: "In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." (John 16:33)
Deep and satisfying joy: "...I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." (John 10:10)
Which is a greater priority to God--the state of our physical bodies or the state of our hearts and minds?
In our culture it seems like we value physical comfort far above most other things.
However, my experience has reminded me that the physical state of my body is not what is most important.
When I first was diagnosed with cancer, I and many other people pleaded with God to heal me.
Sitting here a year and a half later still with cancer would make many people think that God has yet to answer our prayers.
He must not be paying attention or want to heal me, right?
I am convinced that this is definitely not the case. Although He has yet to heal my physical body, I know that He has been working on something much bigger and better than I could possibly ask for in my limited perspective.
His way of healing me has been to heal my heart and free me from the anxiety and depression I have walked with for far too long.
He is making me new.
He is setting me free.
He is healing me.
It was in the midst of completing a task out of obedience (DTS) that I learned this.
I was lying on a cot in the middle of the Haitian countryside, sick with a fever that had reached over 102 degrees. The room I had lived in for two weeks was also the home of cockroaches, countless mosquitoes, a family of mice that ate through my stuff, a scorpion that I found on my bed one day, and a family of birds that enjoyed squawking in the wee hours of the morning and making a mess on our beds with their nest building and incontinence. Needless to say, the conditions of my body and my surroundings were less than ideal.
However, I wouldn't trade that experience for the world. As I lay on my cot soaked in a mixture of sweat and the melted ice that was used to cool me down, I found myself filled with joy like scarcely before. Laughter began to flow and I could not contain myself.
I felt so free and so content.
I was in a place that I had come to love with people I had come to adore, and I had the Spirit of Christ within me.
Nothing else mattered.
It's a funny thing to think of what it took for me to experience that kind of peace but it's just proof that physical conditions and health are not what are most important.
From where I stand right now, I would do anything out of obedience to God and suffer any amount of physical discomfort and pain in order to feel that kind of freedom deep in my soul.
After all, that's what He promised us, isn't it?
Physical discomfort: "In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." (John 16:33)
Deep and satisfying joy: "...I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." (John 10:10)
Protection. [are we really safe in God's arms?]
For my team, outreach came with a lot of sickness. Amoebas and other parasites wreaked havoc on most of our bodies. Several of my team members ended up in the hospital and we ended up leaving Haiti and returning to the Dominican Republic over two weeks early because of all the health issues.
As challenging and frustrating as the sickness was, God used it to teach me something big.
Psalm 91 has been a Psalm I have clung to for many years, yet at the same time it has caused me to ask a lot of questions.
Protection from harm.
Protection from disaster.
He promised these things to those who love Him and acknowledge His name.
So then why do the terrible things happen?
Why did my team get sick?
Why did I get cancer?
Where is His defense and protection in the midst of things like sickness?
I had been asking God for a long time to show me what it means to be safe in Him even when it doesn't seem like we are.
When Cassie, my leader, got extremely sick the first time and had to go to the hospital, I sat down and asked God what He was saying about the whole situation. This is part of what He said:
"...I always count the cost. If it is greater than the gain I do not allow it. I will always protect. If it was not beneficial I would not allow it because that is not in My character. You do not see all that is at work here so do not jump to any conclusions regarding this sickness.... Fire does not come without refinement."
In that moment that He was speaking to me about what was happening to my leader, I realized that the same was true regarding my own health situation.
His promises are true.
Love always protects.
Jesus always protects.
Even though it seems that something like cancer is harmful, I know that in the long run it is for my benefit, for the benefit of others, and for the Glory of God.
This leads me to my next posting...
As challenging and frustrating as the sickness was, God used it to teach me something big.
Psalm 91 has been a Psalm I have clung to for many years, yet at the same time it has caused me to ask a lot of questions.
Protection from harm.
Protection from disaster.
He promised these things to those who love Him and acknowledge His name.
So then why do the terrible things happen?
Why did my team get sick?
Why did I get cancer?
Where is His defense and protection in the midst of things like sickness?
I had been asking God for a long time to show me what it means to be safe in Him even when it doesn't seem like we are.
When Cassie, my leader, got extremely sick the first time and had to go to the hospital, I sat down and asked God what He was saying about the whole situation. This is part of what He said:
"...I always count the cost. If it is greater than the gain I do not allow it. I will always protect. If it was not beneficial I would not allow it because that is not in My character. You do not see all that is at work here so do not jump to any conclusions regarding this sickness.... Fire does not come without refinement."
In that moment that He was speaking to me about what was happening to my leader, I realized that the same was true regarding my own health situation.
His promises are true.
Love always protects.
Jesus always protects.
Even though it seems that something like cancer is harmful, I know that in the long run it is for my benefit, for the benefit of others, and for the Glory of God.
This leads me to my next posting...
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